Spare some change?

I was sitting in Waffle House last Saturday, enjoying an evening breakfast, when a strange woman entered the restaurant. She approached my table and asked for "a couple of dollars." I paused a moment, glanced at her, then towards my friends.

Nobody moved, let I silently wished for her to go away. These situations are ALWAYS awkward for me. Truthfully, the only thing in my wallet were a couple of bank cards, but I doubt I would've given her cash if I'd had any. Call me selfish or heartless, but during these rare encounters, my mistrust meter tends to spike.

After a moment's hesitation at my table, my friend Kat handed the woman a couple bills, and she immediately disappeared. Or so we thought. A half hour later, she was back, asking a new group the same question.

Some argue that giving money away like that only feeds the monster. Bleeding hearts would probably ask this: "If you were in her shoes, wouldn't you want others to give money to you? What if you were homeless? What if you had nothing?"

Ok, I do feel for her. However, when I see people like that, I can't help being suspicious. My mind goes over a list in my head:

1) Do they REALLY need the money, or are they just pretending?
2) What if they're lying, and they just want drug/alcohol money?
3) If I don't give them money, what will happen?
4) Uh-oh.... I'm feeling it....guilt, guilt, guilt, guilt!!!!!!

The Lord tells us to be giving. I want to give, I love to give. So why am a so pessimistic about these sort of situations? It's not that I don't care about the homeless or the needy. I just feel very strange when people ask me to personally hand over my money. They probably don't know it, but I'm pretty broke myself!

The worst part is the verbal guilt-trip. "I can't believe you won't give me nothin'.....that's a nice outfit you're wearin' so there's no way you don't have some money for me!" Etc... That's always bad, but some of these folks are well-practiced manipulators. Watch out for this.

I think the key is to be kind yet abrupt, observant but not hesitant.